June 14th, 2015 Leh Ladakh, India
Vacancies remain unfilled, clouds perched in yet another improbable array, dust grits the teeth, further along the path, what lies ahead depends on the universe.
Stars shining, daring me to put thoughts to the test. Each move recorded for the future, to lend some clue as to where the beauty began, a butterfly admires its shadow of former self, antenna aware of the subtlest of vibrations.
Sun sets over the chimney beaming its last rays through fountains of water, so sweet a flower in the garden of possibility, educate the masses with a novel idea, open the floodgates of compassionate vibes.
Roles reversed, leisure rules the roost. Brick houses falter, the system turned on its head, each attempt to ”improve” the universe might actually snowball into a more beautiful future than we imagined possible.
Looking one another in the eye and connecting the emotional soul within each bodily facade, life moves along like a fairy tale with infinite twists, certain of the ability to earn one’s daily bread, standing like a hero, living like a simple master of one’s domain.
Authorize a sort of dramatic change of course. Escalate the discussion to figuring out exactly what transpires beyond that which reveals itself to the vision’s partial story. A deliberate random step hoping it’s the one to right the course, recognizing fully the senses limitation, constantly generating blips on the otherwise steady stream of consciousness.
A sanctuary found in emptiness, a clean slate, wisdom beyond the years, generous indulgences of the senses, the aging man senses his slipping control, declaring defeat at the moment just prior to triumph.
June 15th, 2015 Leh Ladakh
Remembrance of the silence that gives consent, deliberate decisions to enter and temporarily suspend mindless chatter. Muttered without consideration for love’s pathway through quiet admiration. A meeting of the eyes, curiously scanning, involuntarily approving, sending signals to reassess posture, move the muscles to form a gentle smile, confirmation of mutual interest, an exchange so beautifully simple, no longer seeking familiar features, alternating ratios of facial lines and ripples, followed by subtle mannerisms, threat levels assessed, will this being attempt to assert control in a manner necessitating a shift of the eyes, gazing intently, wondering what swirls around the mind that operates behind those eyes, what illusions must be erased, sharing comfort, if only for a moment, genuinely wishing, hoping, praying the future unfolds without unnecessary worry, peaceful, calm reactions, a reminder to search for beauty, capture its essence, and continue seeking that which gives some sense of fulfillment, contribution to moments of perfection, a reason to hold still just a bit longer, exploring in a more intensified demeanor, perfume smell stuns the mind’s ability not to react, a unique scent wafting through the airway, blissfully awakening.
An effortless blink, and seamless return to unflinching interest, begging for more emotion, to reveal that which remains hidden, until this moment, an opportunity to allow pride to fade away, locked in silent emotional euphoric calm. Noticing precise shifts in energy, weighing its significance, assessing an appropriate response, patiently delivering a subtle squint of the eyes, gesturing an acknowledgement of the mutual understanding. A moment shared and a hint to move along.
Whatever state of being one remembers when he quits his body, that state he will attain without fail.
Bhagavad Gita
June 16th, 2015 Leh Ladakh
No one left to hold your hand, warm tears stream down the cheek like the beads of rain that race across the car window, sorrow fills the heavy heart. Choosing torment, uneasiness of the commitments that life requires. Continue to dig the hole that forms blisters, only to cover it up as if you never tried.
Less warm smiles to give meaning to this long and futile search. No alternate insight. Soften the blows taken, welcome the all-knowing voice within consistently guiding the spirit, monotony dulls the shiny days. Waking without an ounce of ambition, not knowing who wonders if you breathe, whose warm embrace lies beyond reach, distinct possibility of never again feeling the warmth of home, ashamed of wasted talents just to prove a point, learn from the other-side, the reflection shattered, pieces scattered, staring blankly with thought patterns realizing moving about does nothing to calm the endless inner starvation for some clue, some nudge in a bearable direction, endless roads walked feeling quite the same. Simply identify ways to prevent being controlled.
Destinations irrelevant, the story remains the same, suffering around each corner. Running away into the horizon, to come freely aware. Standing at the edge, seeing the line, the limit, the very point. Aimless, at the height of one’s understanding with no direction like a baby turtle cast loose at the shoreline. Simply crawl in the direction that seems natural, let the vast ocean of ignorance consume me.
June 17th, 2015 Leh Ladakh
Abandon useless formalities, convey meaning through sincere action. Thrust chaos into an otherwise orderly and fixed game of, “Get your next valueless token, and convince others to follow suit.” Uniforms signifying desperate attempts for validation, consent to superficial control, playing along on the surface, possessing the cheat codes, clocking in early, clocking out late, having never showed up. Stacking the deck in a game where no one truly wins, only perhaps endures a perceived lack of suffering, envying the camaraderie among the peasants, each covered with a thin layer of dirt, mistaken identities assumed, awareness of the odds, insurmountable barriers to get another chance. Unworthy to settle down, tossed to the curb despite the most gentle intentions. Meandering down crowded familiar streets nameless and objectified, falsely and unfairly categorized. Sitting among empty chairs in a restaurant buzzing with idle conversation, temporarily agitated awaiting the meal’s comfort.
The busy fly curiously flies into the candlestick’s flame, stunned for a moment, walks off the table edge, descending to the ground, never to fly again. Half-hearted displays of behaving like an engaged citizen, mostly just blending in like a social chameleon, taking superfluous naps, dreaming the slow passing days away. Intense stare downs with passing strangers never looking away first. Singing just loud enough for the nearest passerby to notice. Employing universal gestures with staggering accuracy. Searching for the bold and confident voice, finding only fear of being discovered too soon.
June 19th, 2015 Hotel Firdous, Leh, Ladakh
Mothers begging, refusing to wash children, hands, faces, legs, clothes, caked with dirt, fully aware of the reduction in marketability of a clean, healthy, happy looking child. Guilt mounts within each passerby. Mother sits beneath the prayer wheels, symbolizing compassion. A begging man sings passionately in the road, voice echoing throughout the main bazaar, dumping bowls of rupees into his bag, holes in his socks.
Man’s face covered with cement dust continuing to dump load after load into the mixer. So many civil engineers in India and so many citizens spend day after day, hammering bigger rocks into smaller bits, back-breaking labor, a task as simple as a flick of a switch. Fierce sunlight reddens the skin, feeling like the Phoenix flying into the sun.
Names chanted in a crowded stadium, fascinated with observing gravity’s limitation, and the man’s spirit succumbs to the body’s refusal to endure. Kicked to the dirt, basic needs ignored, wondering what late night conversations carry on, and there context difference from those which this mind conducts drilling down to the very core, perhaps just stating the obvious. Close your eyes, observe the sensation of the breath going in, feel the air on the upper lip as it comes out.
June 24th, 2015 Hotel Firdous Leh, Ladakh
Start anew with no prescribed purpose, roll out a blank canvas, set out to capture the essence of beauty. Paint bold and vibrant colors considering reverence to the inner spirit’s demand to create a life with the finest attention to the smallest, seemingly insignificant detail. Watch as the butterflies dance across the sky, patterns of compassionate deeds, fulfilling the greatest intention, spreading bright pastels for those admiring beneath.
Waiting to spot the next vibrant flower, the one which glimmers in the sun’s rays of hope. Taking each moment this life affords and passionately setting forth again and again, to sculpt a masterpiece beyond the limits imposed by societies constructs. Soft petals in full bloom, basking in nature’s destined lifeforce, the one which tugs on the heart strings, sings love of all things living from the mountain’s peak. Seeking an example to satisfy all desires for harmonious relationships among the roots, stem and glorious flower of emotion. So fickle, yet so intertwined with the potential, this shade of quiet blue.
Promising hope and delivering a connection to the silence observed within a dark cave storing the unlikely keys to speaking the universal language – as the light dims, ripples and vibrations persist, distractions from the remaining principle of observing change and allowing it to pass, fully in tune with the melodious sounds within, urging a continuance to this quest for truth, discovering the tangible path to the most utopian community salvageable in the disarray, admitting recognition of the infinite conception, the ultimate understanding achieved by chasing the dream, realizing the dream now lies within reach. Simply grab hold and enjoy the final moments before the dream comes true.
